So I’m representing a very large British company and it’s buying some IP from a California dot com company. The purchase price is big, and the seller is going out of business so its (California biglaw) attorney is calling me everyday, asking me where the money was. My client’s internal procedures were byzantine and several hundred people had to sign off on a disbursement that large so, to be fair, release of funds was taking a long time. Finally, the release is approved but that day was Easter Monday, which was a banking holiday in the UK. The other side’s lawyer calls me up and I tell her that we can’t release the wire because it’s Easter Monday and she says:

“Fuck you. There’s no such thing as Easter Monday.”

I tell that story every year on this day, which I have named National ‘Be Civil To Your Fellow Lawyer’ Day.

Alternate moral – if people suspect you’re a jerk, best to keep one’s mouth shut, lest you remove all doubt.